Garden State

I am back in NC, now after spending nearly three weeks home in New Jersey. It was so hard to come back here. I love NC, but i had missed my sisters and brothers so much, and i have a 2 year old nephew who was my little best friend when i was at home, and of course my mother, whom i love dearly.

I had the oppurtunity to talk to a lot of my relatives for some time, as you know I was to speak at my cousin Jillians wedding, and so I did. I read from 13 Cor, like i was asked to, but preciding that, i spoke about Love. Gods Love, and talked about Paul and how he suffered to spread the word. Gods word did speak, and two of my aunts who have not spoken to each other in over a year, really heard that message and spoke to each other, and since i have left have gotten into family therepy. So that was a miracle to me.

The last time i was at home my brother and I had words and got into a heated argument, where we havent spoken either, or I shoud say he hasnt spoken to me. Michael and I spoke when i was at home and that relationship is getting better as well.

There were so many blessings, I got to spend every morning walking with my mother before she left to work, we live in a nature reserve, so there are plenty of trails to walk, it was so awesome to spend that time alone with her, and truly a gift from God. ( It's hard to get alone time with a parent when there are 7 of you) All in all though, i had a great time, i spent time on the beach walking ( the first week, autumn came quick) and time visiting old friends, and child hood places of the past..some of my siblings and I went to a farm where our parernts used to take us to go pumpkin picking, and then we drove up to PA, for some ( hot dog johnnies) and a hike in the water gap.

I visited my old church that i went to with my ex gorlfriend Kimberli, that was wierd at first, but i was so glad i went because the messages were so awesome, we had a guest speaker from North plainfield one night who preached about the book of Titus, he was awesome and ( funny)...and Pastor Pully had a prisoner on the phone line, and we spoke about sin and redemption, ( our church is broadcast over the radio and internet)

I had other oppurtunity to visit my home church I grew up in and sing there, and visit with people i havent seen in years, i also attended a caberet' held in our church to raise money for our youth trip to Londen, where the Confirmation age kids, go to see our mother church..( we are Church of England)

I am glad to be home, its bitter sweet, i miss my family, and my nephew Nikolaus, is asking Where is happy? cause he can't say my name..but i am glad to be back here and getting to buisness, and i am looking forward to the autumn wich is my favorite of all seasons...Natures metaphor for death, and tehn we have spring which brings new birth, God is an awesome artist...

                                                                Harvey

" No matter what i say, what i believe, and what i do, i'm bankrupt without love." 1 Corinthians 13:3b ( msg)

I have been thinking a lot about this passage in the Bible often read at weddings. Next week, i am going home for a celebration, to join old friends and family in witness to my cousin and her fiance', the truth is niether of them are Christians, in fact most if not all of the people that will fill this 'church' are not believers, so what am I to do?

  The only thing i am supposed to do is get up, read the typical Corinthians passage, sit down, and wonder if anybody even heard a word i said, or are they staring off into some la la land of love?

   What would Paul think about somone using his words, his experience as a  slave for Christ, to just read some pretty words at an empty ceremony, to two people who are making a commitment, that has a fifty percent chance of failing, especially since there is no focus on Christ as Savior. Sure my cousin believes Jesus was a nice guy,  People should be basically good, and be nice to one another, and don't get me wrong Jillian Rose, is one of the most loving and wonderful people you can be around, but why? why , get married in a Church? why even bother bringing God into a union he wont be a made a part of?

   I could go into detail about that, but the truth is anybody reading this will feel the same way, so what am i to do? just read and sit, and forget that all these people i love are dead, that there sitting before me are the living dead.  In  the Episcopal church there was always a response to any question asked in the Book of Common Prayer that required a commitment, i will, with Gods help. Well I will not, with Gods help.

   I am going to walk up to that lecturn, open my bible look over to Jillilan and Mark, to all of my loved ones in this room called a 'church' filled to the brim with death, and i am fullfilling the obligation that i have in Jesus Christ my savior, i am telling them about Paul, what he stood for, who he was, and most importantly, who he served. why he had love, who was the source of that love, and how paul was raised from the dead, when he was born-again into his new life as a follower of Jesus Christ.

   I will follow the most excellent way, the way of my teacher, my friend, my savior and redeemer Jesus of Nazerath. so i ask your prayer because as believers ' we are the church' so on the 16 day of September, i will be in Staten Island, standing before the living dead,  and showing them the way to life, If God is with me, who can be against me?

                                                        IN Christ,

                                                                   Harvey